One of these days, I finally went to a dentist to get my teeth checked. I've canceled the appointment twice before, but there is no running from this. If you know me in real life, you'd know that even without the pandemic, I hate seeing doctors and hospitals -especially dentists. It's never personal. I was maybe stabbed to death in a dental clinic in the previous life or something, haha, wakaranai. I went quite far that I even pulled out 95% of my milk teeth by myself back when I was in elementary as they began to loosen just because I didn't want a dentist to pull them out for me. Now, my adult teeth are crowding, and my molars got lines on them (apparently), not to mention the tartar. I know I need a dentist. We all do.

I left my office just before lunchtime, and I got to the dentist early. The dentist's front desk asked me to wait on a red sofa, and there I sat overhearing the constant screeching of drill sounds. I tried to read an e-book but couldn't really focus, so I opened my front camera to give myself the self-encouragement I needed. I took a selfie too. Below you'll see my face trying to stay calm while waiting on a sofa. Smiling, but it signaled, "Yo. Help me." :') *held my hand* *did the infamous butterfly hug* *telling myself I'm a cool adult* Then the nurse's voice cut my self-talk. She gave me PPE (Personal Protective Equipment, or APD in Indonesian) and helped me put it on like a lady-in-waiting dressing a crown princess. It was pretty awkward but okay.

I was thankful for an articulate dentist with a pretty visual until she told me I got four teeth in need of fillings that day and some scaling too. Also, in the next visit, she will be slicing at least six of my front teeth, and then I'll be all set for my teeth aligner. "SIX?" I took a glance at a white box full of drill needles nearby, and she caught on. She picked up one small drill needle saying that in my next visit, she would use that one on me. It will only slice 0.5mm per teeth at most so it won't hurt. That day I only need to get four teeth filled and scaled first. *laugh and cry* Okay..

I opened my front cam again for another self-encouragement as the dentist was filling some form. I remember thinking, "This PPE makes me look like I was gonna go under the knife. Ah, they say a kidney is worth $262,000, but I kind of still need them both intact." The dentist cut my random thought and asked me to raise a hand if I felt pain. I raised my hand a lot, only to signal her to pull her hand out of my mouth so I can ask questions. "What is that tool for?" "Is it gonna hurt?" "Why should I wear these glasses? Is the water gonna go into my eyes?" "What liquid is that? Is it for anesthesia?" "What are you doing now?" "Welp, I swallowed a bit of the drill water. Is it okay?" The dentist was a Goddess for putting up with me so nicely. She said I was too funny. What a sugarcoat for a girl who's anxious with sharp objects. Well, she moved fast. I stretched my jaws a bit after it was all done. It wasn't bad.

Afterward, she did my dental print, and my most-awkward-moment-of-the-week award went to this. She put her hand inside my mouth, not doing anything, just holding and pressing on the mold there. Three minutes for the upper jaw and three more minutes for the lower jaw. I know it's a normal thing to do, but I'm not even sure if I wanted to put the picture here. I took one for a family update, but you know what, I canceled posting it here because it looks super weird. I'll just describe the picture for you, alright. There was me frowning, staring elsewhere with my mouth wide opened because the dentist's fingers were placed idle in my mouth while she stood so close. I wanted to ask more questions, but I couldn't, so I just stared at my dentist with raised eyebrows, but then I gave up and looked elsewhere again, thinking about kidney. That day was indeed the longest time my mouth had been shaken, with all the scaling, drilling, filling, and printing. :')

That day too, I went home feeling more adult than ever. I faced one more of my childhood fears.

When I checked my phone on the way home, there were lots of notification from 2 work-groups. I held on to my phone the whole time but didn't feel the vibration at all, I wonder. One group sent me gratitude messages because I managed our Management Trainee group's funds and handled the condolences flower board for Sriwijaya Air SJ-182. The other group was a misunderstanding chaos. It was okay soon after I stepped in, but I still laugh as I write this. I can only say that there was this abbreviation from HR that was mistaken for something insulting by my team that they got so mad. How I like mediating disputes like this. :3

You might also notice that in this post I didn't show my before-after teeth. It's because I save it for my future post covering my whole teeth-aligner journey. I promise I will attach everything there. Please look forward to it if you read this~ See you in the other post!

 That one minute...

Written in English:

The flight number of SJ 182, from Jakarta heading Pontianak using Boeing 737-500 Classic with the nose-name of "Citra"; it was the first plane crash in Sriwijaya Air's history to claim death which occurred on January 9, 2021. A heart-wrecking national disaster literally in the first full workweek in 2021. As much as it breaks my heart in pieces as a person that I lost words that day, land crews are expected to function well in the present time and stand strong to face what the future might lay ahead while trying to hold heart pieces together.

Looking at how creative people in Indonesia can be in assuming and commenting online on an airplane crash..this is the least I can do. Doing some fact checks based on data before adding comments and think of the family in grief should be of utmost importance.. Just because our family or friends weren't there in the crash or the airline, it should not be a reason to not being mindful of words.

I won't say any personal opinion here about the crash because I'm fully aware I'm not an aircraft operations expert as well, but instead, I will leave you the best early analysis video based on data by an expert that I can find for education purposes. It is spoken mostly in Indonesian with a bit of English, but written in English:

I'm not gonna lie that I cried hearing the last point of his explanation about what could happen in just ONE minute. I can't imagine being there at that minute... My heart and prayers go to all crews, passengers, and the family members they left behind. We all hope that all crews and passengers will soon be found.</3

Ditulis dalam bahasa Indonesia:

Nomor penerbangan SJ 182, dari Jakarta menuju Pontianak menggunakan Boeing 737-500 Classic dengan nose-name "Citra". Itu adalah kecelakaan pesawat pertama dalam sejarah Sriwijaya Air yang menelan korban jiwa yang terjadi pada tanggal 9 Januari 2021. Bencana nasional yang menghancurkan hati di minggu kerja pertama di tahun 2021. Walaupun hati saya hancur mendengarnya sampai hilang kata-kata, awak darat diharapkan agar tetap berfungsi normal dan berdiri tegap menghadapi kemungkinan apapun di masa depan sambil membawa pecahan hati sendiri.

Melihat kreatif-nya orang-orang Indonesia dalam berasumsi dan berpendapat online tentang kecelakaan pesawat.. paling tidak ini yang bisa saya lakukan. Saya ingin mengingatkan agar kita sebaiknya cek fakta dulu berdasarkan data sebelum berkomentar dan juga mencoba untuk bisa lebih memikirkan keluarga yang sedang berduka.. Hanya karena keluarga atau teman kita tidak ada di sana saat kecelakaan terjadi atau di maskapai penerbangannya, bukan berarti bisa menjadi alasan untuk tidak menjaga kata-kata. 

Saya tidak akan menulis pendapat pribadi soal penyebab jatuhnya pesawat ini karena saya juga bukan ahli operasional pesawat, tetapi saya akan memberikan tautan video analisa awal berdasarkan data terjelas yang dapat saya temukan untuk tujuan edukasi. Sebagian besar diceritakan verbal dalam bahasa Indonesia dengan sedikit bahasa Inggris, sementara point tertulisnya ada dalam bahasa Inggris:

Mendengar poin terakhir dari penjelasannya tentang apa yang bisa terjadi hanya dalam SATU menit saya sampai menangis. Tidak terbayang rasanya jika ada di sana pada menit itu... Hati dan doa saya sampaikan untuk semua kru, penumpang, dan anggota keluarga yang ditinggalkan. Semoga semua awak dan penumpang dapat segera ditemukan. </3 

Last weekend, I had fun trying out golf for the first time. I can't say I played it right, but there was progress and we at least had a good laugh that day.

There are some mistakes that you probably won't even make, or maybe you might. In my case, at some point I thought I was too light because my body just carried away a bit too much every time I made a swing. This also happened when I tried bowling for the first time, I had to plant my feet in a weird anime stance just because I almost fell into the bowling track as soon as I swung the ball, but that's another story. This time, when I tried golf, I realized that basic technique really matters.  

Hope you still enjoy it! :3

Place: Modern Golf & Country Club, Gading Serpong, Tangerang. Song: Champagne Problems - Taylor Swift. Taken using: Oppo A9. Video editor: Soloop (found randomly on my mobile after updating system).

You can see in the beginning of the video that I didn't use any ball at all. I just learned how to hit the rubber used to place the ball on, repeatedly. When I finally tried using a ball, I kept on missing it, haha, smh.. I observed myself during the first few hours of playing, and I noticed this: When I cared too much on the techniques, I'd fail on hitting the ball. When I did the technique randomly and only focus on the ball, I did hit the ball..but it was not a far shot. After a while, I realized that my technique was not right either, but we all learned by ourselves out there. Fortunately, there was someone expert next to us noticed my confusion and decided to come over and show us the right technique so we can copy it. The world needs more nice stranger like this.

While editing the video, I also noticed there was indeed a progress. From always missing the ball, accidentally hitting the ball when I was just measuring the stick, lifting my left heel as I prepared to swing, swinging my right leg over my left leg at the end of the swing (I wonder why would I always spin myself around like that), and many other. Only on minute 01:51 I noticed a real progress, seeing the steady left heel and the posture stability. While on minute 02:23, that's the best hit I had that day, I think, posture and power wise. Finally, the farthest hit I made (that the ball plunged into the lake) is on minute 02:23. Barney Stinson once said, "It's not legendary if your friends weren't there to see it," and yep, none of my friends saw that last hit, though they insisted they did. Haha.. I didn't mind they didn't see it, but I just had to tease them about it for the sake of teasing.

Meet Putri (@faradilla.putri), Aldo (@reonaldoalfela), and Fajar (@fajar.chaerul). I put their Insta too this time, because I wasn't sure before if I could do that, until they complained I was being heartless in giving credits. Hahaha.. Forgive me I didn't know, dear friends from office. I'll remember that :p 

This is a story of me picking up food delivery in Putri's place the next day. All delivery men should drop the food in the security gate there, so we had to pick it up by bike because it was quite a distance. That morning, I offered to get them and it's been a while since I rode a bike. I thought I might as well go a few round around the blocks to exercise since I picked it up fast. There was nothing wrong then..until it was.

Pardon the quality, it was captured from a phone video. Yep, Fox Rain! It was bright but suddenly it just rained so heavy when I just got the food and left the security gate. I sped up so much until my legs hurt and I was still drenched. What did Putri and Aldo do? They were debating whether to pick me up with car or not when they realized I was already back dripping -as wet as a sewer rat- and Aldo immediately took out his phone to record me complaining about the rain and laughing. Well, I haven't taken a shower that morning, but..still.. 

 

I've been going around brain-washing people at the office to watch Shingeki No Kyojin (Attack On Titan), because the first episode of its season finale just started yesterday, December 7, 2020. I'm still on season 2 right now but I'd still get to the fourth season sooner than those who just started, right? Muhuhaha. The more people to talk about it the better, but unfortunately, this post is not about Attack On Titan. It's about something else I've been waiting for too. Sweet Home!

Sweet Home is a Webtoon series that started on January 15, 2018, and ended on September 29, 2020. I was so sad because after reading it for two years, it really ended- just a day after my birthday. Now that December 18 is only 10 days away.. I feel kind of ecstatic to write about it.

Netflix series Sweet Home (스위트홈) the first season consists of 10 episodes and is directed by Lee Eung Bok, the same director of Descendant of the Sun and Goblin. I honestly don't know who Song Kang is (acts as Cha Hyun Soo) because I haven't watched any of his drama, but I know Lee Do Hyun (acts as Lee Eun Hyuk) from Hotel Del Luna. That sad fireflies guy who waited for Man Wol for three thousand years as fireflies and still didn't get the girl. I really need to see Sweet Home to see if I can let go of that fireflies-guy image after seeing him in this series. As for the female leads, I know Park Kyu Young from IONTBO and Go Min Si from The Smile Has Left Your Eyes (hate that sucky ending).

For me, Sweet Home is a story about how Hyun, a suicidal boy who lost a family in a car accident, going through superb character development while fighting for humanity and controlling his desire during the monster outbreak. Also, the fact that the whole story's setting takes place inside an apartment building is really thrilling.

I smiled when I opened Netflix's page and found "This show is.. Scary, Dark, Suspenseful." under "More Details".

Do you know that this Netflix series is said to have the highest production cost in K-Drama history? Yes, it costs about US$2,4 million for each episode. It even surpasses Arthdal Chronicles with a production cost of US$2 million per episode. Knowing that, I would expect a good CGI with the monsters too and the trailer is looking pretty insane :3

You can bet that I was one of you people who tried new things at home during quarantine in the first half of 2020 to stay sane. From drawing on the wall like Rapunzel, cooking new recipes from Tiktok, learning Korean in Duolingo, installing Tinder to find language partner (silly me), cutting my own hair and bangs while watching YouTube tutorials, and finally dyeing my hair with crazy colors.

I will jot down a bit of my hair history before I colored it with Cool Ash from Mise En Scene Hello Cream. Couples of months ago, I agreed to model for my friend's hair product. She bleached my hair twice and pink pastel was applied on the outer part of my hair while purple on the inner layer. The product was Sens.us from Italy and it was good, but I gotta admit that the color combination was too eye catching that whenever I went for groceries people were always staring like I was some K-pop idol undercover, or odd specimen. To stop the feeling of being a circus lion, the same friend put bleach one more time a week after and dyed my hair in full magenta. I thought, I would just dye it back to brown once office is starting. However, after a month or so, I decided to dye it brown myself..and somehow, my hair turned moss green lol..which is still a mystery to me. After that, I just applied stronger dark-brown color the next week. What a crazy year for my hair. >.<

Now that the moss green was starting to show again, I was kind of curious if ash color would stand out okay on my bleached moss green hair. If you're wondering, my natural hair color is dark brown, but the only two colors I'm willing to stick permanently with are ash brown and light brown. Since I don't think I'll torture my hair with bleach again in the upcoming years, so I'll just try ash now. I can always pull off the light brown without bleach later on.

The package arrived with some cheap Blackpink card, I don't think I need to take a picture of it, so let's just have a look on the stuff inside the box now :3

 

 

 

                    

                       

It looked like this after the oxidant (02) was mixed with colorant (01) and wrapping ampoule (03) ..then I changed the cap too. 

 

Now putting on the plastic cape. It was just a simple cape but it made

the work easier because I don't need to wash extra towel after.

(This pic also serves as my "before" picture)

 

I didn't take pictures while I was applying the color, because..well, I couldn't. :/ However, the process was indeed so much easier with the comb head cap. It helped to even out the color with the same hand that did the coloring. I started from the inner layer of the hair outwards and I applied quite boldly too. Even so, when I was done, there was still quite an amount of coloring left. I waited for around 30 minutes, then I washed my hair. I applied the conditioner and I really love the smell, haha. After that, I dried it out with a hair dryer and taadaa! It was done.

Here are the pictures of the result:  

 

 

 

Taken indoor. Hair looked darker and the ash color appeared to be.. silhouettes.

 

     

Under the sun, out on the balcony.

I'd say I like it ash, but by the time I'm writing this, the annoying moss green is already starting to show again and it's only been two week-ish. ;( I can't wait until my hair grows much longer then I'll lose the bleached part completely before starting with anything new again, that if I still want to try anything new at all. :p